Everything seems to be coming unravelled, spiralling out of control. I have been to every appointment with her, every treatment, seen every tear, as well as crying a few of my own, but as well as trying to deal with cancer, everything else is going pear-shaped too - As I have been working from home to try to provide emotional and practical support, my job has suffered, and my employers now owe me over £2000, my mother is being a nightmare and has forced Sharon and I to make huge decisions without having the time to seriously consider the consequences.
I have now moved in with Sharon and her 2 teenaged sons and the pressure is becoming unbearable - Sharon does not seem to want, or be able to talk about cancer and what it is doing to her life,my life, OUR life, the only people who know are me and her sons, and as a result we seem to be living a huge lie. She is becoming increasingly angry and confrontational to me when she feels well, but when the treatment knocks her sideways the only one who is there for her is me, as she is trying to protect her kids, her friends don't know and she has no real family to speak of.
It's just so hard to cope with her anger. I can't help asking her "are you ok babe?" when she looks tired or ill, but she sees it as fussing and being "in her face", we just seem to be rowing all the time, the only time she seems to have the ability to speak to me with a civil tone of voice is when there are other people around, but when we are on our own, it just falls apart.
Please help me. I am trying my best to be here for her, but don't know how much longer I can do this on my own, I just need some advice on how to cope with this constant pressure, and how to be what she needs.
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